Choices..

We do not live by fate.. it matters only what we do.. It's not fate that brought us together but what we choose.. We all have a choice.. We all can change, no matter how many times if you only believe.. Timing is also everything.. Action only works when the time is right.. It's not fate.. It's what we do.. Almost nothing is impossible..

Don't face the truth of the future if you're not happy with it.. Change it then.. We only got one life time so don't waste the chance..

We all people have different interest, and knowledge, but we're all human and we're the same.. We could have the same interest or knowledge..

Just do better in everything.. Best isn't necessary but better is..

Don't compare with people.. Compare to yourself.. That gives improvement..

Whenever i lost my girlfriends, it's hard for me to forget the moment..

Whenever i lost my girlfriends, it's hard for me to forget the moment where we used to have fun.. if i'm lucky, it wouldn't last for several months.. perhaps a year.. Wondering what she's doing everyday or whether if there's someone hitting on her.. It's sad to know that she doesn't care bout anything anymore.. yea, women, who are just deceiver xD. kidding.. Anyway, that's what i used to do.. Moving on..

Failure

Once again, hoping too much doesn't work at all.. Never.. I thought i could continue my love stories again.. But while expecting too much, I din have the chance to do it, probably not yet.. I'm confused of making decision cuz i don't know what to do..

Being better isn't perfect.. Being yourself is.. And that's the best of being perfect.. =D

Everything fails me.. At least that's how i felt.. Maybe i'm not too good.. Maybe i'm not the one.. I wouldn't know cuz you never tell me.. I don't know how to give up either.. Maybe if you could have tell me everything in just one way, we could decide the best for us..

Agreed that two weeks really changes everything, And in a way it makes me felt more for you.. And the person like me for i know, doesn't know how to forget everything.. Might take some time.. And i guess we seriously need to take a rest now and let both of us continue..

LOLx

Lolx.. I actually thought i could face her.. Be myself or who i am in front of her.. But all i did was looking down, having difficult breathing and not even a dare to say a word.. I always thought that I rather be your friend than losing you in my life, i was wrong.. I rather forget you than torturing myself for the rest of my life..

Probably you'll think, why post this on a blog when I do not care about her anymore.. It's because this blog is what i created for.. And now its the end..

Nothing Is Impossible..

Boy:How can a girl who said that she loves me more than a thousand times end up saying she has no feelings towards me suddenly?

Girl:Cause nothing is impossible..

Boy:But i seriously need you..

Girl:Enough hopes.. There's no us in the future anymore.. it's fate..

Boy:Nothing is impossible..

Moving on, without fate..

My words are no longer powerful, as your resistance is just immune to me.. And therefore, there's no weakness in you falling back again.. And that makes me without strength but to live with your existence.. And that's why there's me when there's you..

Not a shame to say I love you, as not to come in mind when comes to love.. Indeed it's disturbing but our past memories are the reason what gives..

Probably everything i do now is useless..Irritation .. But it gives me pleasure for doing it.. I enjoy..

It seems i have already lost you completely.. Knowing to not know who I am anymore.. The past and the moments that will last till the end has just erased..

I'm just a burden to you.. I was told to give up.. And so i did.. But that doesn't mean I should stop loving you..

Happy anniversery.. And the day to forget everything..

People with their lifes..

Well, I would know what life is about, yet perhaps.. But what really matters here is they're living in it.. Who we are now? By judging who we are, is based on what we did in the past.. Through my experience, living with the people we know gives us the memories bout the past.. Its also about where you from.. And about strong feelings you had on each people.. I could say studies and education doesn't give life or memories but the resources to live our life.. And that it can't be judge.. I've been wondering, sooner or later we all gonna be gone.. Why bother living in the world where u got to be emotional,with feelings and memories, that will be sure to fade away.. I wouldn't say god created us but the way we are form.. If god created us, what would god get from us living? Watching how our life style is? probably.. To keep them company, as most of us have to question about and deny the existence of god? By the way, i'm a free thinker and it doesn't mean that whether i believe it or not.. But if there's a god, then let the god itself to show me, a sign.. Maybe we're form by science.. I wouldn't know.. But i guess what really matters about life to people is about themselves and about them living in it.. Person with its own..

Decision?

I notice i've made quite a number of mistake making choices, my choices.. Most of them just leads to failure.. Maybe that's fate, but who knows.. If i got choices, i wouldn't know which to pick.. The thing is now, If i love her, it doesn't mean that i have to find her everyday right?.. hmm.. What's the point, i won't get any answer most of the time anyway.. For once i'm being a fren, it really hurts alot.. But i wouldn't wanna find trouble either.. this could be my only chance.. Hope i could really see some results.. You know what?? maybe i should just give it some time.. Its not like i'm seriously gonna lose her completely.. We're still living under the same sky, and i'm happy with that.. I can't fail my finals.. Yet again i wouldn't wanna disappoint everyone.. Degree or acca after final? lol.. Should i really plan this now as it is still far away? Taylor or Sunway? seriously.. Iphone or drumset? shits.. So far i guess i'm doing great, except for losing someone that matters, but anyway, moving on.. I don't feel left behind anymore..

Felt abandon..

Was it worth everything? it depends if everything will recover in future.. But what if it doesn't? Then i shouldn't have taken this too serious.. Had something that's so special and i lost it.. Promised that i'll never lose it, lost it cause i'm not accepted anymore.. Wasn't the promise but the feelings.. I couldn't keep this pain any longer.. I was weak to keep this relationship strong.. It's the best thing that's ever happen to me, how could i afford to give up.. People please, don't tell me that i should if you don't really understand me.. Anyway, Was it not enough to give it some time? I'm complaining, yes, cause i got trouble of letting it go.. I want it to be with me, so, i could be the top of the whole.. With it, i never have to be alone.. And with it, i just wanna be happy.. I'm getting crazy.. I had no idea what else i could do beside looking for it every week during weekends, and staring at the entrance where i'm usually welcome with loves..

I miss her..

Why when everything is just as normal as it seems, and someday at the end it has to be ruined.. I tried having fun, on my own.. I miss the words i used to hear,the laughter,the touch.. Pity me not because my heart's a slow learner, pity me because i have a heart.. Blame me not because i annoyed you, blame me because i cared for you and i still do.. Giving up on you is the day i lose everything..

If i were to forget you..

If I were to forget you, It would be a big thing, for me.. Have I gone crazy I wonder, being like this still, as crazy as to fall in love with the girl.. Ignored, Avoided, being Rejected in every way, I'm barely a friend, or perhaps the person you ever knew.. I have a life, I wouldn't wanna get hurt too.. Decided to forget you, but how could I..?? forgetting you was the speech from me.. If I want happiness, it should be your's cause I love you.. I'll get use to live like this,I hope.. But one thing for sure, I'm not emo, cause i know I'm still not giving up yet..

Love Poetry or Love Express?

Well, more or less both are the same if it is all about the girl to you, depending how deep you felt for her.. In my way, love express, cause its the feelings that i wanna talk about.. Words of course, can't be stronger than action.. But when you don't have the chance to show by taking action, what else can you do besides giving both love poetry and love express? But one thing for sure, everyone has the chance to prove everything.. Either way, love poetry and love express can't do anything but whether they believe or not, it's just to let them know how you feel..

Love

There are some words spoken that can never be taken back and there are some words that will never be forgotten .

True love can blind you but at the same time if u let it , it can also open your eyes .

To love someone is to understand each other , to laugh together , to smile with ur heart and to trust one another .

One important thing is to let each other go if u cant do this .

When u love someone , all ur saved-up wishes start coming out

People wont remember what u did

People wont remember what u said

But people will remember how u made dem feel ..

You know it is love when you want to share everything with her even her pain ,

You know it is love when u cant stop thinking about her ,

You know it is love when you'de rather be in a relationship eventhough u're apart than not in a relationship at all

But most of all

You know it is love when your happiness is dependant upon hers

At the end, I happen to love her..

Day goes by, heart pump 0.05 sec faster, as i almost can't take it any longer being jealous.. Trying to be happy, thinking less, enjoying life with people.. But at the end, she ruined me.. I'm not trying to be miserable but this is how it looks like when you lost someone.. Why do i have to be so loyal when i'm the one who is suffering? She might be just an ordinary girl, but special is what i thought for her.. I gave her time, hope she enjoys it, cause i'll be always over her.. memories of ours, where can it be forgoten easily, as everything we did was so special, and everything we did is because we love each other.. Hey! I'm a crazy Guy right Here, Who is Still All over Her! and its Because I still Happen To love Her all The Time and I'm HappY!

Afraid..

Afraid? that's normal.. it keeps you alert.. without it, you wouldn't do well.. Everyone is scared of something for sure.. It will never end.. For example, when you're in college, you were afraid that u can't pass ur SAT exam, but at the end you actually pass your exam and soon you graduate.. After you graduate, you were still scared that u can't find a job, family, living, house, when will you die, and etc.. So yea, shouldn't be afraid to tell out that you are afraid.. Share this with people and you will feel better cause everyone is the same, just like you.. Miserable people will usually stick with miserable people, and happy people stick with happy people.. Those people who is fearless in everything, they're just confidence in life, or maybe they just got no life at all.. Now the only thing i'm scared of is living alone..

First look?

Well i just came with this guy who inspired me to talk about the impression on 1st look.. 1st look huh? Well all i can say is judging the people by their cover should not be the case.. 1st impressions while important should not be taken too seriously.. When you meet people at the 1st time, they tend to pretend that they're someone that they're not.. only once you get to know them and become acquainted do they relax and show their true colors, however bad they might be. This is a mistake most of the time because everyone knows that 1st impressions stick. You should be yourself around people you have just met. If not, you can create the wrong impression on people. Once you show who you really are, you become an alien to them, different from the guy they first met.

College..

Well.. This might be my last post for this week as i'm going back to Kl today.. I miss home.. Wish i could spend time with people more.. College, paradise for short, hmm it wouldn't be a paradise to me as there 's something is still missing.. but anyway, fun place to be in.. But i wanna talk to you bout my college.. its not as fun as it seems.. You know, everyday i have to be locked myself inside the office doing hard work.. Not only that, never have a good taste of food for dinner.. Well i'm not actually talking bout college but talking bout my life during college, which is outside the college and the place i stay in.. That's why i miss home.. Beside hardwork, bored to death.. Everytime i'll have to update my cash book account, which is very lame =="".. If you think its cool, get a life.. I know how to manage my own money =="".. Don't really like traveling far as i felt like i'm so far apart from the people i know.. Should i be complaining or it would be a very good thing to make myself discipline.. For after a few weeks during college, i talk well, just a little bit.. Communication is always important around the world.. Knowing how to judge a person well.. I felt healthier, and a little less weak.. To where i got this improvement from? College? most probably..

Forgetting her wasn't an option.. Or maybe it can't be..

Continue loving her, continue hurting myself.. sigh.. She's everywhere on my mind.. I miss her so badly.. i miss playing games with her.. i even miss my alarm which wakes me up early to look for her.. Why can't i forget her? Why did i have to meet her at the 1st place? This wouldn't happen if i din get to know her.. But i think I'm suppose to be happy as it was the love i never had before.. Suffering, the pain, burden, miserable, anything else beside can't sleep at night.. Felt like being the saddest person on earth.. I'm thinking, there's nothing in this earth but me and her.. How long could this last? cause i can't take this anymore.. i can't stand the pain.. this isn't fair.. my happiness counts too..

Rant on emo..

Lol.. People are emo cuz they act like one.. in one of the concept of emo, is pms, or regularly used word, emf (emotional mother f*****).. These people are just so emo that they can't just stand the criticism around them or they just can't take a joke.. they'll leave themself talking to no one but being alone.. But this wouldn't last long..

Thinking emo is cool?? That's wad you think.. That's what emo people think.. People mostly being emo because they thought it would suit their character more better and cooler.. Many things can be better.. If you're making youself emo, that was an act.. if you're really an emo, be miserable den, if that what makes you happy..

Frenz.. =]

frenz!! well this blog are just for random =].. jason, joevin, quah, erik, malveen, daniel, who else?? my best fellaz.. all i can say is wad good frenz most usually say is you guys are great comforter..

Loved I Ever Had

Well the reason i started this blog its because i felt alone.. I lost someone which i'm still so desperate for.. I thought, maybe by expressing myself through blog, i won't feel that alone.. Well whenever people lost someone they loved, they felt lost and that's the fact =].. Anyway, back to the topic.. Loved i ever had.. It all started when i 1st stared at her.. She was wearing all white.. that was of course the most unforgetable moment.. And started our relationship 2 months later.. We did great.. She did not only inspire me because she was pretty but i was inspire because of the love and care she gave me.. The phrase "We Yell, We Argue, We Ignore, But We Still Love Each Other" was very true as we broke up like 8 times during our relationship.. i manage to get her back everytime but there was the silliest mistake i ever did which made me lose her.. Which is i din really trust her much as she was out studying.. Until now, there was no result for getting her back.. people told me to forget her as she wasn't the only one in this world.. They told me by saying " In the forest, there are many tress.. Don't because of that tree, you have to waste the others".. that was actually true but what came out from my feeling was telling "If she was the most beautiful tree in the forest, of course i'll get the best".. Well.. What i did heard from her that we could only be friends.. that was fine as it was the only relationship i can still further.. Hmm.. If friends is the only relationship between us then it wouldn't last as i don't want to get hurt anymore.. I'll wait, till the time comes =].. smiles**